What does grace look like?
I thought I knew. Until I was thirty-five years old, I enjoyed a charmed life. I didn’t have to look for blessings in disguise; my blessings paraded themselves boldly.
Trials were light and few. Favors fell heavily and bountifully.
I knew I was undeserving of this grace.
I was thankful. But it felt unfair. I saw people all around me experiencing trials, many of whom were walking through multiple fires at one time while I remained completely untouched. I didn’t know why.
It also felt scary. Jesus said that in this world His followers would have tribulation (John 16:33). At some time or other as we walk this sin-sick planet, everyone will have trials. Where were mine?
What were they going to look like?
How would I handle them?
How painful would they be, exactly?
I knew my turn was coming. I just didn’t know when. And I felt like I was deserving of an extra dose or two because of my unscathed life. When that proverbial “other shoe dropped,” I was certain it would appear in the form of a steel-toed workboot or a 5-inch stiletto.
It was at this time that God began to work in my heart and my husband’s about foster care. We recognized that we weren’t meant to clutch God’s blessings with clinging fists; rather, He wanted us to hold open hands under the fount and allow the overflow to spill onto others in need.
We took the foster care training classes, and even bought a larger home with more space for extra little people. We kept our cell phones with us around the clock, eagerly anticipating the call from social services telling us that children were on their way.
But a different call did – the one telling us my husband had cancer.
Not only that, but within just a few months, he also lost his job.
We found ourselves shaking our heads, throwing up our hands, and asking each other, “What is happening? Why are we facing these trials now, when we’re following hard after what God has called us to do?”
We were at a stopping point, biding time in God’s waiting room.
What we didn’t know at that time was that a family on the other side of town – one we had never met – was falling apart. Jobless. Homeless. A marriage crumbling, as good as dead. Parents who loved their children but found themselves unable to care for them properly because of their own complex issues.
They were at their breaking point, completely unaware that God was pursuing them relentlessly.
Until one fateful day when God called my family out of the waiting room to meet our divine appointment. Our world collided with the one across town, and suddenly, three little boys filled the empty beds in our home and burrowed their way into our hearts.
Is it possible to welcome three little strangers into one’s home and not learn something? Weighty things like love and loss and grace that calls us and more grace that equips us.
Grace that means God walks tenderly with one family through the most intense trials of their lives at the same time He’s chasing down a family that has rejected Him at every turn.
I don’t know the end of our story yet. But I do know there’s a man across town whose three little boys are back in his home where they belong. That man didn’t know God two years ago. But now he does.
He and his wife weren’t part of a church two years ago. But now they are.
The man’s mother wasn’t a believer two years ago. But because of her son’s testimony, now she is.
And what about those three little boys who entered our home having never prayed before? Well, now they do.
As evidenced by the seven-year-old’s lunchtime prayer on his last day with us: “Dear God, thank you for this food. And thank you that we get to go back and live with Daddy and Mommy today, and for everything You’ve done for them. Amen.”
What does grace look like?
Sometimes we see it in blessings abounding.
Other times, grace appears in God’s waiting room.
It can even come wrapped in a package of cancer or job loss.
Grace looks like a divine appointment. A divine calling. Divine equipping.
And it looks like a God who pursues people through it all.
Wow, this is powerful, Jennifer. I didn’t know your husband has cancer- I’m sorry. I will keep your family in my prayers. What a beautiful story of redemption, with the kids that you fostered, and their parents. Your words of wisdom about grace ring so true. I was happy to vote for your submission.
Thank you for your kindness, Dawn, and for voting for me in the contest. Truly, it’s a story that shows off our God’s glory. We don’t often get to see the puzzle pieces of life come together on this side of heaven. It blessed me tremendously to see a glimpse into His plan in this situation.
Thankfully, following surgery to remove his thyroid as well radiation and other follow-up treatment, my husband is now cancer-free. He still receives ongoing care and frequent testing, but we’re thankful that he is generally in good health. I’m grateful for your concern for him!
Beautiful post, Jennifer! I love to see the hand of God at work in two separate families, bringing them together in this way. It’s easy to forget how interconnected our stories are from God’s perspective!
Jen 🙂
It’s an amazing story, Jen – looking back and seeing His hand so clearly in those circumstances has bolstered my faith more than I can adequately express. How many countless ways is He working that I never even imagine?!
Stopping by again from Grace and Truth – just as good the second time! 🙂
Jen
🙂
Stunning post, Jennifer! It gave me goose bumps and I and simply in awe of your perspective and story here! Thank you for this!!
I was thankful for the opportunity to share it. 🙂 How great is our God!
What a story of God’s provision and handiwork! It’s amazing to sit back and watch Him work!
It is, indeed, Sarah Ann! Thank you for stopping by. 🙂
wow – I started reading this the other day but wasn’t able to finish. The little one’s prayer on his last day with you…oh, my heart. Thank you for sharing this!
Rebekah, I recorded that prayer in a blog post almost immediately following those events. I’m so glad I did, because I don’t think I would’ve remembered it otherwise. Thank you for reading, and for letting me know how meaningful it was to you! You bless me, friend.
Praying for your husband, Jennifer. So glad that you were able to see God’s grace working and His place for you in this. So often we have to have blind trust and faith and know that He is working all things for His purpose. What an amazing thing to be part of. God’s blessings to you as He strengthens each of you. Stopping in from Grace & Truth.
Thank you so much, Kim. Thankfully, my husband’s cancer is gone – at least for now, and we’re so thankful! You’re right – being able to look back and see some of the puzzle pieces come together has been quite an amazing joy.
What a hard, difficult and yet beautiful story. So thankful the Lord took your ashes and made them beautiful! such amazing life-changing testimony how He used your family in the midst of your own hardships for His Kingdom’s sake!
Thank you for sharing your story with all of us 🙂
Thank you for praising our Lord with me, Johanna! He is worthy.
Thank you, Jennifer, for sharing that beautiful story of God’s grace & how when He is pursuing you because He has something for your life, there’s no limit to what God can do. That whole family’s life is changed forever!!! The ONLY thing God can’t do is fail!!! God’s love & mercy is endless!!! Your story was inspirational & showed your faith in God even when facing Goliath!!! God is amazing & mighty & I pray that you & your husband will change many more lives.
Sherrie, your words have blessed me today. Thank you so much for your encouragement, and for your prayers. To God be the glory, great things He has done!